


Step Sequence

by bluespring864



Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Feelings Realization, First Kiss, M/M, POV Yuzuru Hanyu, Past unrequited love, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-03
Updated: 2020-03-08
Packaged: 2021-02-26 14:13:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,902
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23005111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluespring864/pseuds/bluespring864
Summary: An old friend stopping by the TCC brings memories to the surface, leads to a great deal of introspection and more than one serious discussion, and sets something new into motion.A Jason/Yuzuru story (with an important guest appearance by Javi), featuring most of the Cricket Club Team.(Complete)
Relationships: Jason Brown & Yuzuru Hanyu, Jason Brown/Yuzuru Hanyu, Javier Fernández & Yuzuru Hanyu
Comments: 72
Kudos: 39





	1. Spiral

**Author's Note:**

  * For [emilia_kaisa](https://archiveofourown.org/users/emilia_kaisa/gifts), [K1mHeechu1](https://archiveofourown.org/users/K1mHeechu1/gifts).

> Here I go again with another rare pairing... Thank you emilia_kaisa and K1mHeechu1 for christening the tag, this story is for you!  
It's a bit dialogue-heavy and very introspective at times and has somehow gotten longer and longer... I hope you don't mind :-)
> 
> Chapter Titles are all legitimate step sequence moves and steps and like a proper nerd I've tried to choose them in a way that fits the plot at least somewhat.
> 
> (As always, my RPF is available for registered users only. Feel free to send it to friends if you want to, I just don't want it showing up in search engines and the like.)

It has been a draining day, with jumps misbehaving and, even worse, a persistent feeling of being out of sync with the music – he hadn’t actually been, both Brian and Jason immediately reassured him when he started to whine pathetically about it, but Yuzu isn’t sure whether that’s a relief. No matter if it looks right; if it doesn’t feel right to him, there’s something seriously wrong.

And then, just now, at the end of their evening session, Brian had dropped another thing on his head – or his heart, rather.

Javi’s coming for a few days to do choreo with David. When Brian told them, Yuzu put on a bright smile and tried to quench the worry worming through his gut. It almost made him queasy, which is how he has ended up here, on a bench directly off the ice. Jason is beside him, finishing his thought on an old Johnny Weir programme they’d been chatting about, before Brian interrupted them with the Javi news.

Apparently, Jason doesn’t find it strange that Yuzu wants to just sit here, when everybody else has already cleared out. He also doesn’t seem to be bothered by Yuzu answering with nods and half-smiles only. Well, that might be because he often does that when he doesn’t have anything immediate to say.

Yuzu doesn’t plan on telling Jason about it any time soon, but there is something about his voice, his melody of speech, that calms him down.

So he listens, and watches the ice being resurfaced.

He has always found it strangely meditative, to see the Zamboni do its rounds, leaving behind a clean sheet of ice.

Unfortunately for his peace of mind, Jason is now going on about how he’s excited to finally properly meet Javier, because they never really got beyond much more than friendly greetings over the years, and Jason had been busy with Nationals when Javi had last come in for a longer stretch of time. ‘I’ve got so many questions about his programmes, Yuzu’, and ‘We should go for dinner after practice, don’t you think’, and ‘Everybody’s always telling stories about him here, I feel like I already know him so well’…

And that’s where Jason slowly falls silent. Maybe it’s because he’s finally caught on to Yuzu’s mood, maybe it’s just because he has remembered that yes, everybody here loves talking about Javi, but Yuzu almost never does.

Yuzu contemplates turning his head to look at Jason, as the silence falls fast and heavy between them, but in the end he doesn’t, because he knows what he would find.

He’s seen it before, a smile slowly dropping from that face that is just so – so made for smiling. He doesn’t want to see it again, especially when he seems to be the cause of it this time.

So why he speaks up, he doesn’t know. Something compels him.

“I loved him. So much.”

It’s perhaps unfair to drop this on poor, unsuspecting Jason, but now it’s too late.

Jason… Jason understands immediately, without further elaboration. Yuzu knows that because he goes tense beside him. And then – and then Jason makes a wounded, throaty kind of noise that takes Yuzu completely off-guard. He realises that, without having consciously thought about it, he had very much expected a typical Jason-reaction, maybe a concerned ‘Aww’ and a comforting hand on his shoulder, maybe even a hug.

He somehow has distressed Jason, and suddenly his own worries seem quite insignificant. It’s Yuzu who half-turns, putting a hand on Jason’s shoulder.

Jason flinches a little at the unexpected touch, but doesn’t pull away.

He’s not looking up either, and that makes Yuzu blurt out more words, in a desperate attempt to fix whatever he has done.

“I just… that’s why I’m quiet about… Just, if he’s coming next week… I worry. But… Um, it isn’t… well, not... I don’t love him anymore.”

Now Jason does look up, with wide eyes, and Yuzu thinks he must be looking back at him with just as much shock in his own eyes, because he has never said that out loud.

But it’s true. Finally, it’s true.

“Oh, Yuzu.”

There’s the hug he had expected.

Yuzu feels like crying. He always does when he thinks of what has never been with Javi, but then he also feels like laughing, because it’s a relief, to actually realise that he can put this behind him. He has been putting this behind him.

“Thank you,” he whispers, his head still on Jason’s shoulder, his hands gripping onto the fabric of Jason’s shirt, their legs awkwardly pushed together because of the sideways-hug on the bench.

“What for?” Jason whispers back, and his voice sounds a bit wobbly.

“For making me realise this.”

Jason goes very still for a moment, and then he’s slowly pulling back.

“You mean… what do you mean?”

He is looking at Yuzu intently, and now that he’s dragged Jason into this, he’ll have to elaborate, he sees that. He searches for the right words.

“I.. uhm, for years- since beginning, almost, when I came here, and Javi was here…”

It doesn’t help that Jason looks more and more pained, somehow, the further Yuzu gets. But then, Jason’s face visibly smooths over, and he sits up a little straighter.

“Just tell me,” he says, in Japanese, and Yuzu breathes a sigh of relief and does exactly that. English has never come to him easily when he’s emotional, and Jason seems to just understand that.

“_Arigatō_. What I mean is, when I came here… I fell in love with Javi.”

That is almost more difficult to say in Japanese though. The somewhat foreign English words can give a bit of emotional distance. Yuzu soldiers on.

“It didn’t happen immediately, but I had a bit of an obsession with him already, when I arrived, and it just got worse and worse. He’s such a kind person, you know.”

Jason nods quietly, as if he really does know, and Yuzu can’t help but notice that his lips are pressed together, and his eyes are a little bit shiny. Oh god, if Jason starts to cry, he will definitely be done for as well. He continues, and even though he wants to get it over with quickly now, he keeps a slow pace. He wants to say this right.

“Well, for a while I dreamed. And I thought I saw that he might… return it. But I came to understand, over time, that he didn’t. He never told me in so many words – probably because I never told him either, I think. But, you know, he made it clear, with the way he behaved around me, and by talking about his girlfriends now and then, and, oh, he had this look which I hated. Just a kind of ‘I’m sorry’ look?”

Jason is pressing his lips together again while nodding that, yes, he can imagine what Yuzu means.

There’s only one last thing Yuzu has to say, and then he’s done with this day, that has become a hundredfold more draining than he could have imagined, but also immensely cathartic. He feels lighter with every word.

“When he left, I didn’t want to let him go. I mean, I never really had him, but I wanted to hold on desperately to the little I had, I can see that now. I thought, I thought then that it would be the end of the world, but I think it has been good for me. And I just realised that now. That it’s over.”

In the quiet second that follows, Yuzu dreads Jason’s reaction, because he has never laid himself bare like that, at least not so personally, not with words. He can leave a lot on the ice, but this right here is a different kind of vulnerability.

Jason looks at him, a suspicious glint still present in his eyes, but he simply nods in confirmation of whatever he finds on Yuzu’s face, and opens his arms silently for another hug.

Yuzu melts into it, and finds that he has no intention of moving again, any time soon.

They draw apart rather quickly, though, because somebody very loudly clears their throat beside them.

“Um, sorry guys. But we’ll need to close up now, you know that.”

It’s the guy who drives the Zamboni, and he’s speaking mostly to Yuzu, because this isn’t the first time he has lingered at the rink in the evening, especially after an unproductive day.

Jason being here with him this time gets them a look of curiosity, mixed with a bit of embarrassment, presumably for having interrupted the hug. Yuzu wants to answer, to apologise, and to get the hell out of here now, but he is thrown for a moment by the fact that he doesn’t know the man’s name. _Even after all these years_, he thinks guiltily.

“Sorry, Dave!” Jason says, his voice a touch too bright, but almost sounding his usual self. “We just, uh, had to finish this conversation. And forgot the time.”

“Yes, really sorry. Won’t happen again,” Yuzu pipes up, and Jason adds, “Give us five minutes.”

There’s nothing left to do but hurriedly get out of their skates and then out of the Club.

As soon as they’re out the door, Yuzu feels incredibly awkward.

Whatever spell had been on him tonight, it has been broken, and he can’t really believe that this conversation really happened. He talks a lot with Jason, more than he ever has with Javi, because Jason is – apart from usually being talkative, and nice, and easy-going, Jason is… safe.

There has never been this electricity that had been there with Javi, and Yuzu knows he can trust him completely. Still, he never thought he would share this much with anybody, really.

He realises he’s just standing in the parking lot, staring off into space again.

Jason has tilted his head and as soon as Yuzu’s eyes focus on him, he says, with a strange little smile,

“You’re regretting telling me all of this, aren’t you?”

“No.”

It has been a good thing, this, as much as it makes him uncomfortable in hindsight. Speaking of uncomfortable, there is the matter of Jason’s slightly off-key reactions. As if…

“No,“ Yuzu confirms again, but adds, on impulse, “only if I’ve burdened you.”

“Oh, don’t worry about me!”

Jason’s reaction is immediate, but his smile is still not quite right, and gone far too soon. He doesn’t let Yuzu think about it, though, asking another question straight away.

“So are you still worried about next week?”

Next week, when Javi is coming. _Right_. Actually, it will be really nice to see him again.

“No, I’m not worried.”

Yuzu smiles, brightly, trying to get Jason to smile back at him like that, which is usually easy. This time, he doesn’t manage it.

Looking very serious, Jason only pulls him into a brief goodbye-hug, and says,

“I’m glad.”

And then he turns to go.

Yuzu watches him leave with a frown on his face.


	2. Twizzle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Javi arrives, a lovely dinner is had, and Yuzu still has no clue what might be going on with Jason.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the kudos and comments so far. As always, I very much appreciate hearing from you!
> 
> I forgot to mention yesterday: this story doesn't really have a fixed timeline, but is vaguely set at the start of a new season.

Just as he knew it would be, the week with Javi is exuberant, and crazy, and absolutely worth all the reminders from Brian and Tracy and Ghislain and David to ‘please focus’.

Strangely, Jason somewhat keeps his distance for a bit in the beginning, but Yuzu isn’t having any of that. He remembers Jason’s initial excitement about getting to know Javi better, before Yuzu had derailed the conversation.

So, starting from the second day, he just drags Jason into the morning welcome hugs when Javi shows up, and then also into the clowning around on the ice. And of course they simply have to do their stroking exercises together, Yuzu happily letting Javi take the lead again.

Because Jason seems to have forgotten all about it, Yuzu reminds him of the idea to have dinner with Javi, which Javi immediately approves of.

“How about tomorrow evening? Oh, and also I’ve decided we’re all having drinks on Friday with Zhenya and Jun and the whole gang. And you’re coming, Yuzu, you can drink orange juice or something if you like, but you’ll actually show your face. It’s not even going out, really, we’ll be here, we’re gonna have a Cricket Club Bar!”

He seems to expect protest, but Yuzu just acquiesces. If Javi’s only here for a week, he wants to make the most of it.

Javi grins brightly and says in a false whisper,

“Jason, has Yuzuru Hanyu just agreed to party with us?”

Jason throws him a little when, instead of joking around with him, he says, “Oh, am I invited too, then?”, which makes both Javi and Yuzu go, “Of course!”

They grin at each other. It used to happen sometimes, that they spoke in unison, and it had always creeped Brian out.

Jason just reacts with a bright,

“Well, then sure, thank you!”

He’s looking more at Yuzu than at Javi, for some reason, and he seems too grateful, as if he’s astonished they’ve thought to include him. Yuzu has rarely seen him so insecure, and he doesn’t like it, so he puts his hand on Jason’s shoulder and says,

“And dinner tomorrow, the three of us, yes?”

Jason lifts his eyebrows, looking somewhat sceptical, but then Yuzu pouts exaggeratedly, and he finally gets a real smile for that, one of those that lights up Jason’s whole face.

“Yes, of course. Let’s do that.”

~---~

It only occurs to Yuzu about a minute before he leaves the house the next evening that Jason might have been afraid of being the third wheel.

He has to admit, he still gets a bit of a tunnel vision at times, when he’s with Javi, but he had made a real effort to include Jason these last two days, hadn’t he? Maybe Jason thought Yuzu felt obliged to do that, which wasn’t the case at all.

When he gets to the restaurant the other two had let him choose (because, as Javi put it, ‘you’re the most picky eater of the three of us’) Jason is already sitting at their table, staring at his phone and looking a bit forlorn. Yuzu checks, but no, he isn’t late. Five minutes early, in fact.

He makes his way to the table, and Jason looks up when he’s halfway there, a happy smile slowly spreading over his face, like sunshine coming through the clouds.

“Hi, Yuzu.”

He gets up, and then doesn’t seem quite sure what to do with his hands, so Yuzu goes in for a quick hug.

“Hello, Jason.”

It is a bit awkward.

This must be what it’s like to go on a date, Yuzu thinks for a second, but then Javi’s there, impressively on time as well, and Yuzu needs to keep himself from thinking about all the times he imagined going on a date with Javi, and clumsily knocks over a pile of menus on the shelf behind his chair, and everybody laughs.

Javi remarks on never having been able to comprehend how Yuzu could be simultaneously one of the most graceful and one of the most clumsy people he knew, and Jason immediately agrees – “Yes, that is weird, right?” Yuzu pretends to be annoyed with them both, and the strange moment from before is gone. What follows is an evening full of laughter, and skating stories (and some non-skating stories), and a lot of silliness.

Javi talks about his family a fair bit, which prompts Jason to do the same, then Javi tells them excitedly that he finally started to make progress with his guitar when he had to stay off the ice for a while, and Jason chimes in about not getting around to playing the piano often enough, and seeing them get along so well makes Yuzu really happy for some reason. Well, those two are his friends, or the closest thing to friends Yuzuru Hanyu has, so it is only normal that he wants them to like each other, right?

“I think we might be boring Yuzu,” Javi says, just because he’s been quiet for a while, and before Yuzu can protest, Jason already shakes his head and laughs.

“No, we’re not. Believe me, I am a pro at talking too much, I know what it looks like when Yuzu’s getting bored.”

Yuzu frowns, because he doesn’t think he’s ever been bored when talking to Jason, it’s just that sometimes he listens to the voice more than the words – oh, okay, he can see why Jason would think –

“You are never boring,” he states firmly, even though he’s not sure Jason believes him.

All in all, it’s a really lovely evening, so much so that it almost makes Yuzu reconsider his policy of not going out.

~---~

Jason offers to drive them home afterwards.

He drops Yuzu off first, which is kind of a shame because they’ve just started to sing along to the radio (well, Jason started it and Javi enthusiastically added his rather off-key voice to the mix, and Yuzu mostly giggled uncontrollably) and now he doesn’t want this moment to end. It feels so light, so completely unburdened.

Yuzu tries his best to at least ease out of it gently, thanks Jason about five times for the ride home and then spontaneously adds,

“You sing beautifully.”

Before Jason can reply, he turns towards the backseat.

“And you sing horribly, Javi.”

The laughter of two of his favourite people follows him as he walks up to the front door, half-turning around to give a little wave. Javi is pressing his face to the window like a little kid and Jason has wound down his window and waves back as they pull away.

Even though it’s getting really late, Yuzu stays up for a while. First he’s too giddy to sleep, then he almost dreads putting this perfect day to rest. Surely something will go wrong tomorrow, to balance this out.

~---~

It doesn’t though, is the thing. They don’t have as much ice time together for the rest of the week, because Brian wants them all to get some work done, but when they’re together, everybody’s getting along swimmingly.

It’s a happy week, which draws to a close much too soon.

Sometime on Friday, there’s a moment where Jason skates to a stop beside Yuzu, who is watching Javi chase Jun and Conrad around the rink, zipping past several other skaters working on bits of choreo. Yuzu is already done for the day, but he can’t stop watching, nostalgia for the Javi-days having him in his grip.

“He really is quite charming,” Jason says softly, as Javi apologises profusely to Evgenia for cutting in in front of her and almost making her lose her balance. She just laughs and assures him that it’s fine.

Yuzu hums his assent to Jason’s comment, then turns towards him with sudden fear when it really registers.

“Please tell me you’re not…”

He doesn’t know how to go on. The words get stuck in his throat.

It isn’t exactly reassuring that Jason immediately gets what he means, though he laughs it off pretty convincingly.

“Oh, no! No, Yuzu, I’m not, um…”

He’s turning endearingly red (again, a bit worrying).

“…I’m not _crushing_ on him,” is what Jason finally settles on.

Yuzu’s certain he’s gone a bit red in the face as well, but still he asks,

“Sure?”

Jason is looking at him intently, a half-smile twitching on his lips before he replies.

“Absolutely sure.”

“Good.”

Yuzu says it firmly. He feels so protective of Jason all of a sudden.

_Please don’t you fall for the straight boy, too. It wasn’t all bad, but I really wouldn’t wish it on you._


	3. Counter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A conversation between Yuzu and Javi about past and future (which includes Yuzu finally getting a clue about something that is very obvious to everybody else).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like this one, hope you'll like it, too :-)

Javi finds him alone by the ice on Friday evening.

Yuzu hasn’t turned any lights on, and is leaning against the wall, looking out over the shimmering white surface.

He isn’t hiding away from the party, he really isn’t. He’s just stepped out for a second, just needed to leave the noise and chaos behind for a moment. He’ll go back soon.

That’s what he tells Javi, who shakes his head with a fond smile.

“I’ve not come to drag you back. I actually wanted to talk to you.”

Dread plummets like a heavy weight into Yuzu’s stomach. He’s still leaning back against the wall, though he feels anything but relaxed now, with Javi looming over him slightly.

What could it be? Is he getting married? Or thinking about retiring from the ice completely, so they won’t even see each other at shows? Or will he – _oh god_ – acknowledge this thing that has stood between them? Now, when it’s finally as good as gone away?

“It’s about Jason,” Javi says, taking a step to the side and leaning against the wall beside Yuzu.

_Oh. What?_

“What about Jason?”

That came out too defensive, and Yuzu doesn’t even know why.

Javi has stumped him.

What could Javi possibly have to say about Jason that has gotten him looking so serious?

“I...well…”

It seems that Javi has been thrown by his tone. But he rallies quickly, his hand now gesturing from Yuzu to him and back again.

“So, something has changed, yeah?”

The gesture so very clearly implies ‘between us’, but what on earth could that have to do with Jason?

“Yes,” Yuzu replies nonetheless, eyes narrowed.

Should he elaborate? He doesn’t really want to. There’s really not a lot Yuzu can say without spilling the whole thing, and he’s pretty sure Javi doesn’t want that.

What does he want, then?

For lack of something to say, Yuzu looks at him. Really looks at him, which he hasn’t dared to do in a long while.

He sees kind eyes; an earnest, though slightly apprehensive smile; and a very familiar face, illuminated strangely by the dim light that’s coming through the windows and reflecting off the ice.

Javi is beautiful, and he always will be. Yuzu will always find him attractive, and he’ll always love him. But not in this magnetic, desperate kind of way that he used to. No, he’ll love him as a friend, or maybe just a tiny bit more than that, with this tinge of regret that this wasn’t meant to be. But mostly with an intense fondness for this lovely human being right here.

“You know, I really love you.”

Yuzu just says it, and enjoys Javi’s look of shock for a second, before bursting into fits of giggles that aren’t even that hysterical, all things considered.

“As friend. You are a really good friend, Javi.”

“Oh my god. You… You’re just beyond belief sometimes.”

Javi looks so shaken that Yuzu almost takes pity on him. Almost.

“I deal with… _dealt_ with… for _years_, Javi. I can get, like – a revenge, this one time, yes?”

Revenge isn’t quite the right word, because that would imply that Javi had been in the wrong, and as much as Yuzu had been angry with Javi now and then, he doesn’t think it was all that justified, in hindsight.

Javi, however, looks contrite.

“Oh, Yuzu, that’s fair. I’m so sorry. For all of it.”

Yuzu shakes his head vigorously.

“Not your fault.”

Javi screws his eyes up for a second, clearly gearing up for something uncomfortable he has to share. It’s a facial expression he seems to have adopted from watching Yuzu over the years, and, as always, it tears at Yuzu’s heartstrings. He pushes that feeling away.

“It was a bit, though?” Javi is saying. “I might have been… leading you on, unintentionally, for a while? That’s what I wanted to talk about.”

Yuzu doesn’t want to talk about it. He wants to lay it to rest, once and for all.

“You wanted to talk about Jason.”

“Exactly.”

All right, now his confusion is complete, and it clearly shows on his face, even in the dim light.

Javi turns further towards him, and lays a hand on his shoulder.

“Yuzu,” he says, very carefully, “do you not notice the way he’s looking at you?”

_What?_

_What. _

_No. _

_No no no._

As if someone has cut the strings holding him up, Yuzu slides down the wall, and hides his head between his knees.

“You’re wrong,” he mumbles, and even he hears in his voice that he doesn’t really believe it.

It... oh god, it could very well be; Yuzu doesn’t notice these things, does he, and then there are Jason’s strange half-smiles to consider, the unexplained reactions when Yuzu told him about having loved Javi, and – with a sudden shocking clarity before his mind’s eye –the expression on Jason’s face when he’d told Yuzu that, no, he was sure he wasn’t crushing on Javi.

_Oh god._

Well, he could be off the mark, but Javi is clearly convinced of it, and this is just...

Yuzu makes a frustrated sound.

When he looks up, Javi has knelt down beside him, looking concerned.

“You might be right,” Yuzu presses out.

He doesn’t want it to be true.

_Poor Jason._

“Hey,” Javi has a hand on his shoulder again, and he’s looking a bit puzzled, “don’t make it into a bigger problem than it is, yeah? I just wanted to say, maybe hold off a little, until you’re sure?”

“Until I’m sure?”

Yuzu’s voice has come to a screeching halt straight in the middle of ‘hysterical’. He hates it when that happens, when it grates in his ears like that, accurately reflecting the turmoil inside.

“Sure how you feel about him?” Javi says, slowly, looking puzzled now.

“Javi, I don’t feel that way about Jason.”

Yuzu is sure about that, at least. He is sure, so why does the sentence lose conviction halfway through? He’s only just gotten over Javi; there has been absolutely no room to fall in love. And with Jason, of all people.

Jason, who’s safe.

Jason, who he can talk to.

Jason, who makes everything a bit lighter, a bit brighter.

_Oh._

His shock must be apparent on his face, because Javi is smiling at him so very kindly.

Yuzu swallows.

“I… I actually don’t know.”

There. Finally something that feels like a perfectly true and honest answer.

Javi nods. He looks just as drained as Yuzu feels, after this rollercoaster of a conversation. But in contrast to him, Javi seems content. He’s got his point across.

He gets up, offers Yuzu a hand.

“Try not to go all awkward on him, okay? Just… you touch him a lot, and you smile at him a lot, and you compliment him quite a bit.”

_‘…And that’s almost exactly what I did to you, Yuzu, with no intention of going any further.’_

Those words remain unspoken, but they both hear them all the same.

When they rejoin the party, they get pulled back into the fray right away, but just as they come through the door together, Jason looks up from across the room, straight at them, and then very quickly away.

Oh, Yuzu has been so blind.


	4. Spread Eagle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuzu worries a lot, Javi is (mostly) helpful, and a decision is taken.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know, this story is moving painfully slowly, but what can I say, I'm perhaps a bit too much of a fan of Slow Burn... I'll make up for it by posting two chapters today.
> 
> Can I have some comments, pretty please? :-)

Yuzu knows that if Jason comes in on a Saturday, he will be gone before noon, and that’s exactly why today, he only goes into the rink after the physio he has in the early afternoon. He doesn’t want to avoid Jason, but he desperately needs time to think.

He hasn’t slept well.

After tossing and turning for a few hours, he’d finally fallen asleep on the conviction that, no matter how much he might want to be for Jason’s sake, Yuzu wasn’t in love.

It didn’t feel like being in love – where was the desperate need to never be apart, where were the moments where he couldn’t look away, no matter how much he tried, where was the almost irresistible urge to kiss?

If all of that was missing, how could he possibly be in love?

It wasn’t a particularly comforting conclusion, but a conclusion nevertheless.

So Yuzu finally fell asleep.

Only to jerk away a few hours later, and realise with a start that his conclusion was vanishing in the light of day, melting faster than snow in a time-lapse of spring.

He wouldn’t know if all of those things were truly absent until he saw Jason again.

And even then, who was to say that they wouldn’t come over time?

Who was to say, and there was the crux of the matter, that he had any previous experience to draw on?

The first time, with Javi, he had fallen in love eyes wide open, conscious of it and utterly unwilling to stop it. This time… well. If indeed there is a ‘this time’, he has been doing the exact opposite, not noticing anything until after the fact.

His mind is running in circles the whole day, through physio, and off-ice training, and the little bit of ice time he can get away with on a Saturday, before Brian gets antsy about Yuzu not taking enough breaks (which is a clear case of the pot calling the kettle black, but Brian’s still the coach, so he wins).

Today, even the stretching exercises he usually hates don’t really register. He does them automatically, his mind elsewhere.

He has to see Jason.

But he also needs to calm down, and get some order into his thoughts, if he doesn’t want to make an absolute fool of himself.

~---~

When the doorbell rings on Sunday evening to announce Javi, Yuzu still isn’t thinking much more clearly. He has cleaned the flat, caught up on all his online courses, reorganised his notes and done a hundred other things just to keep from thinking about the Jason Situation.

Javi looks tired and happy, after visiting friends outside of Toronto for the last two days. He thanks Yuzu profusely for offering his guest room for tonight, flashing one of his sunniest smiles. Yuzu responds in kind. It’s getting ever easier to ignore the weak flutter of butterflies in his stomach that smile still elicits. Nowadays, there’s only a pale echo of what it used to do to him, and at this point, Yuzu’s more excited than melancholy about that. He’s always been much more of a fan of looking forward than of looking back.

Tonight, however, looking forward would mean remembering that he and Jason have back-to-back training sessions tomorrow.

Living in the moment it is, then.

They eat the dinner Yuzu has prepared, and watch a film afterwards. They talk about all sorts of things. Yuzu even asks about Javi’s girlfriend, and its nearly not awkward.

Javi sounds content, and a bit calmer than Yuzu has known him.

It’s perhaps not all that surprising, how much more and how much more easily they can talk, now that there’s no giant elephant in the room anymore.

Yuzu goes as far as to say that they should talk more, and Javi acquiesces immediately, telling him to just call from time to time.

He repeats that statement the next morning at breakfast, after he finally asks,

“So. Have you thought about – “

He doesn’t go any further, as Yuzu has pressed both hands over his ears and squeezed his eyes shut for good measure.

A second later, Yuzu has to open them again, though. Javi has seized both his hands and prised them gently away from his ears.

“Very mature, Yuzu,” he chides.

“Don’t want to think about it. Have tried it, doesn’t help.”

“Doesn’t help with what?” Javi wonders.

“If only I knew.”

Javi takes another long look at his face, then he lets it go, with a final,

“Call me if you want to talk, Yuzu. I mean it.”

~---~

Yuzu does exactly that, and probably much earlier than Javi expected. It’s barely nine hours later, Javi must have only just arrived home, and he sounds groggy, but not annoyed.

“Come to some conclusion?” he asks evenly.

“Yes.”

Yuzu pauses for a moment, then delves straight in.

“You’re right.”

There’s only a hum of confirmation on the other end, so he continues.

“You’re right and I’m terrified.”

Javi is right about Jason, definitely. They only saw each other briefly today, but it was enough.

Yuzu is used to admiration from other skaters, but, oh, Jason looks at Yuzu like he just adores him. When he thinks no one else is looking, of course… but Yuzu made great strategic use of the mirrors at the rink today. He also caught a reflection of Tracy watching Jason looking and shaking her head somewhat fondly.

That had been a bit much, realising so abruptly that Tracy might suspect what was up. Yuzu had stumbled, and, instead of trying to steady himself, he’d let himself fall like the drama queen he could be. And guess who’d been there to help him up.

Yuzu had thanked him with a one-armed hug, and had stepped back quickly afterwards, because he’d been shocked to find that, not for the first time in recent memory, he really really didn’t want to let go.

He’d been lucky Jason had ended his session shortly after, because Yuzu’s concentration had been well and truly shot.

“I want to be with him.”

It is clear to him, all of a sudden. No doubt about it.

And, _oh no_, he has just said that into the phone, said it _to Javi_, who’s reply is a sharp indrawn breath, and then,

“I was just about to ask whether you’d hung up. But… well, I guess that answers that question.”

He suddenly sounds a bit wistful, which he really has no right to be.

_You didn’t want me, after all_, Yuzu thinks with an abrupt burst of bitterness. He lets it burn through him for a moment.

_Really, Javi, you shouldn’t have offered to talk if you can’t handle it._

He realises he has left another too-long pause. Awkwardly, he speaks over the static.

“Yes, so…”

He tapers off again immediately, not knowing what to say.

Javi seems to have rallied quickly, though.

“Hey,” he begins, and Yuzu is glad he didn’t try to videocall. That gentleness in Javi’s voice might be a bit much with the visual to accompany it.

“Tell me why you’re terrified.”

And there’s a million reasons for that, isn’t there? Yuzu can’t really imagine someone being in love and not being afraid of the enormity of it, the unguardedness of it.

A few parts of Yuzu don’t belong to him anymore, he has given them to the world, and he protects the rest ferociously.

Only he can’t, in this case, if indeed he decides to act on what he’s feeling.

There are a lot of things about him that only he knows, and he’s not sure he would want to share all of them with someone, even someone he loves. But at the same time he knows he wouldn’t be able to hold back. Could someone truly want him, with all of his carefully hidden flaws?

He tries to explain it to Javi, at least a little, knowing that, neither having the same temperament nor the same experiences, Javi is quite different from him – much more open.

Javi will try to persuade him to do something about this, Yuzu is pretty sure, and that’s exactly what happens.

A long, meandering back and forth discussion finally culminates in,

“Do you know how lucky you are, Yuzu? What I wouldn’t give to have my girlfriend in the same place as me for once, instead of halfway around the world!”

_Really, Javier. Are you trying to guilt me into this now?_

Yuzu knows that is probably not it. The incredible kind of person Javi is, it’s very possibly him who’s feeling guilty, for never having been able to give Yuzu what he wanted. Be that as it may, Yuzu has come to his own conclusion.

‘Wait and see’ seems too cowardly an approach for his taste.

If he’s sure, he should be doing something about it.

Javi chuckles when Yuzu tells him that.

“Go get your man, Yuzu.”

Well, what can Yuzu do other than reply with a groan and a slightly scandalised,

“Oh my god, Javi.”

If he’s completely honest, though, he likes the sound of it.

_Go get your man._


	5. Loop

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuzu tries to flirt, Tracy and Evgenia have something to say, and some progress is made.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As promised, a second chapter for today. Only one chapter and the epilogue left after this.

_Go get your man._

It’s easier said than done.

They’re both exceedingly busy this time of year, when the programs still feel so new and unfamiliar, when there’s things to tweak here and there, and things to despair about, because it simply doesn’t work like that, _can’t you see that_ _David? Brian? Tracy? Anyone?_

Yuzu fights for his creative vision, and watches Jason do the same, just as fiercely, but with a few more kind words and apologetic smiles for their coaches. It’s not that the people around them don’t want the best for them, but sometimes you actually know better, and you’re the one who has to skate it, in the end. They’re both now at a stage in their careers where they’re not afraid to speak up.

Instead of the frustration he often feels this time of year, Yuzu is elated by every little victory they achieve. He high-fives Jason, and backs him up, and watches him skate a bit more often than he used to, whenever he can spare the time.

Jason soaks it all up, quite often with a bemused look of ‘Me? Really? You care about _me_?”

Yuzu wants to shout his answer, but he doesn’t, at least not in so many words. What he does is to stop holding back smiles, and looks, and kind words (he hadn’t even realised how much he’d been holding back, before).

Today is one of those days where he’s just beaming at Jason, and he’s past the point of caring if anybody notices, really.

As is often the case, their ice time overlaps, but Jason had started earlier, and finishes before him. Yuzu watches him skate away to leave the ice, twirling around for a second to throw a quick look back. A few weeks ago it would have meant nothing but quirky, exuberant Jason being himself, today Yuzu fancies it is Jason wanting to get a last look at him before he leaves.

Yuzu beams at him and throws an imaginary rope on which to draw Jason back towards him.

Jason laughs, but breaks eye contact almost immediately, seemingly embarrassed.

_Come on, I’m trying to flirt here, please, please just get it._

Yuzu shouldn’t have expected his increasingly blatant attempts at getting Jason’s attention to go unnoticed by everyone else, but it’s still a bit of a shock when Tracy pulls him aside as soon as Jason has left.

She looks at him, evenly. As kind as she is, she’s always had the uncanny ability to make Yuzu feel small if she wants to. (Luckily, she rarely does.)

“Do you know what you’re doing?”

“Yes.”

She looks thrown for a moment, apparently not expecting that answer. Or maybe expecting Yuzu to play dumb about the question.

Finally, all she says is,

“Be careful.”

_I think I’m being much more careful about this than about anything else_, Yuzu doesn’t reply. He remembers just in time that perhaps that isn’t saying much, when ‘careful’ is a word usually absent from his vocabulary.

~---~

Compared to Tracy, Evgenia is much more direct.

“You hurt him, you’re dead,” she says quietly, almost completely out of the blue.

“So stop playing with him.”

Alright, Yuzu had maybe been teasing Jason just a little this morning, by soliciting his help with the always-elusive English language, and then asking him on purpose to define some increasingly suggestive words – words that made Jason squirm with embarrassment, while Yuzu tried to look all curious and innocent.

It’s just that he’s getting a bit frustrated, because Jason isn’t really reacting to Yuzu’s admittedly rather terrible attempts at flirting. Well, Jason blushes, and giggles, and adverts his eyes, but he doesn’t actually _do_ anything about it.

It drives Yuzu up the wall, because he sees no point in waiting, if they both want this.

So it’s with complete honesty that he affirms,

“I’m really not.”

Evgenia looks frightfully intense for a few seconds more, then her expression clears.

“Oh,” she says, sounding surprised, “do you actually like him back?”

“Yes,” Yuzu confirms, eyes narrowed. He would have thought it might be weird to talk about this, but he’s mainly annoyed now. First Tracy, now Evgenia. Why do they have to seem quite so astonished?

Well, at least Evgenia looks apologetic now.

“I just thought… I thought you were like me. I mean, less the liking girls part.”

She grins at him, suddenly and brightly, then goes back to serious, leaving no time for Yuzu to intercede. What would he have said, anyway. It seems she has him all figured out.

Or maybe not entirely, because the thing she adds is,

“I just meant, in that skating takes priority?”

She is five years younger than him, Yuzu sometimes forgets. Five years ago, as much as he’d already been pining for Javi, he’d had that same mentality. He’s not sure when exactly it had changed.

“Skating is priority,” he replies, drawing out the words and finding that they leave him unsatisfied.

“This is… another priority?” he tries, then nods to himself.

Yes, that is about right.

He doesn’t even mind all that much when this leads to Evgenia laughing at him for ‘having it bad’.

Still smiling, she leaves him with the words,

“What are you waiting for, then?”

Her slightly mischievous smile stays with Yuzu for the rest of the day, and hearing her say what he’d already been thinking really drives the point home.

There’s only so long you can linger in the anticipation of something.

If Jason doesn’t get it, then more drastic measures are in order.

~---~

That’s what he’s convinced of right until the moment when he’s standing in front of Jason in order to ask him out.

With all the evidence pointing to the contrary, even his panicking brain can’t make him believe that Jason doesn’t actually like him at all, but… what if, for example, even if Jason is attracted to Yuzu, he doesn’t actually want anything to come of it?

Who would like the reality of dating Yuzu, after all: he never has time, he usually doesn’t like to go out, he’d have to ask to keep it quiet for now… The list goes on.

So it’s apparently no use that Yuzu had decided that today, Thursday, when they’re ending their training at the same time, would be the perfect moment to talk to Jason; that he waited for the moment right after they left the ice; that he is clutching his favourite bracelet in his right hand (just for luck).

It’s no use, because the words won’t come.

That is rather inconvenient, seeing as he has already stopped Jason in his tracks by saying his name.

Jason is looking at him expectantly, as the silence drags on.

“Stay and watch for a bit?” are the words that finally leave Yuzu’s mouth, with a gesture towards the skaters warming up now. Immediately, everything inside him screams ‘Coward’.

“Sure.”

Jason is looking at him with slightly narrowed eyes, but acquiesces easily nonetheless.

“I’m in no hurry.”

He plops himself down on the same bench they always seem to gravitate towards.

_What the hell am I doing_, Yuzu thinks, as he follows suit.

They watch Jun go through his paces, and Gabby rehearse her step sequence over and over, and Evgenia start a good-natured argument with Brian. Jason comments on that last bit.

“Sometimes I wish I could do that.”

“You could,” Yuzu says, knowing full well that Jason respects Brian maybe a little too much, and would never dare to.

Jason reacts with an over-the-top ‘oh, come on, don’t make fun of me’-pout that makes Yuzu laugh; bright and giggly and folding in half for a few seconds.

The good-natured soul that he is, Jason laughs with him. As they calm down, he remarks,

“You’re in a good mood, recently.”

His tone is still warm with laughter, but he looks quite a bit more serious. Yuzu doesn’t know what to say to that, so he just nods quietly, a small smile still on his lips.

After a moment, he decides to ask,

“Should I not be?”

Jason looks reluctant, all of a sudden, but he answers.

“I thought you… you might miss Javi, when he left again so soon.”

His voice is still bright, only now his eyes look dejected, and Yuzu can’t have that.

“A bit, sometimes. But you’re here.”

Jason stares, confusion written all over his face.

“But I’m not Javi.”

Oh, come _on_.

Yuzu makes a show of looking him up and down. _Very_ slowly.

“No,” he finally concludes his assessment, accompanying it with the most intense look he can muster.

In a definite first, his attempt at flirting actually seems to work, and he feels his heart beat double when Jason blushes and for once doesn’t look away immediately.

_Go on then, Yuzu, just say it._

“Will you go to dinner with me?”

_Finally_.

Jason is looking at him with wide eyes, followed by a light frown. Yuzu should perhaps clarify.

“You know, it was fun? Dinner, when Javi was here?”

_No, no, no,_ what is his stupid brain doing? Except perhaps for English troubles, Yuzu has never before had such difficulty with saying what he means.

Jason is sporting a polite smile now, of course he is, because he bloody well thinks Yuzu meant ‘as friends’.

This is excruciating.

He hides his face in his hands before Jason can answer, letting out a muffled,

“Didn’t mean like that!”

“You mean it wasn’t fun?” Jason sounds utterly lost.

Yuzu takes a deep breath, looks up, shakes his head.

“Not that. I meant, we go for dinner, but different. On a date.”

_Finally, finally, finally._ That should make it clear.

But Jason isn’t reacting at all. He’s seemingly frozen into place, eyes impossibly wide. Yuzu stares back helplessly, unable to break eye contact.

_Please say something._

“Boys, at least put your jackets on if you keep sitting around in the cold.”

Yuzu almost jumps out of his skin, and from what he can see, Jason isn’t any better off. Tracy is shaking her head at them, holding out two jackets. After a second of absolute silence, the lines around her eyes crinkle, as she tries and fails to hide her amusement.

“Did I interrupt something?”

Yuzu is still shell-shocked when Jason answers dryly,

“Yes.”

And then he grabs his jacket and gets up.

_Wait_, Yuzu wants to say, but the word gets stuck in his throat.

Though, as if he’d heard him anyway, Jason stops and turns back.

“Friday?” he says, without really looking at either of them. Still, there’s no hiding that his face has gone beet red since Tracy showed up.

Yuzu finds it way too endearing, that new emotion piling on top of the dizzying feeling of relief that Jason has given him an answer, albeit phrased as a question.

“Yes. Friday. Good.” He manages to croak out, and then Jason is gone.

“What’s Friday?” Tracy asks.

Yuzu might be blushing a tiny bit, too, now.

“Date,” he mumbles.

“God help us.”

Tracy’s reply is immediate, but her smile is way too kind for her words to be taken seriously.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you have anything at all to say about this, please don't forget to comment :-)


	6. Jump

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The date. (It goes a bit awry, as you'll see, but maybe that's for the best.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is it, last full chapter. A (at least partially) fluffy reward for those who've made it so far. I'll post the epilogue tomorrow, which is from Brian's POV, and was very fun to write ;-)

Yuzu is changing a black shirt for a different black shirt, checking the time every three seconds. He had texted the address of the restaurant to Jason, and Jason had offered to drive them there, so now Yuzu’s afraid he won’t be ready when the doorbell rings.

He changes the black shirt for a dark blue one. _Or maybe…_ _stop this_. _The blue one is fine._

Hm, will it look like he’s trying too hard if he styles his hair differently?

God, he is being ridiculous.

He tries his best to stop fretting.

“It’s only Jason,” he murmurs to himself, but that doesn’t seem to settle his nerves any.

It would be nice to call someone, just to spill this confusing whirl of feeling inside him, but there isn’t anybody. His mum, who’s back in Japan right now, would certainly take the call, but Yuzu sure doesn’t want to talk to her about it, at least not at this moment in time. Javi… they’ve talked enough about this and if Yuzu were to go into detail about his feelings for Jason it could get plenty awkward. Evgenia… certainly not, because there’s a good chance she’s just been talking to Jason.

That thought doesn’t calm him down either – what if she told Jason all about the conversation she’d had with Yuzu?

At this moment, the doorbell rings.

~---~

It goes as badly as can be, to begin with.

Jason is uncharacteristically quiet on the car journey, and Yuzu certainly doesn’t know what to say in his stead.

Then, it appears that Yuzu has picked a restaurant with absolutely zero parking space, and as they finally get out of the car a few blocks away, it starts to drizzle (Yuzu spares a second to mourn his hairstyle).

And then, worst of all, the waitress giggles in a definite ‘oh my god, I know who you are’ way as she seats them.

There’s a persistent feeling of being observed after that, which doesn’t help either of them to relax. The food, when it finally arrives, isn’t bad, but somehow it’s not half as good as Yuzu remembers it from a previous visit, now that part of the staff is throwing discreet glances at them and the other half is googling who they are on their phones.

“I’m so sorry. This is bad.”

Halfway through the main course, Yuzu finally blurts it out.

Jason looks devastated for a second.

_No, not you. Everything else. It’s all going wrong._

Yuzu doesn’t get a chance to say any of that, as Jason suddenly whispers,

“We could leave.”

_What? In the middle of the meal?_

“That would be so rude.”

Yuzu says it dutifully, but apparently not convincingly, because Jason gives him a conspirational smile. (A smile, finally!)

“But you like the idea.” Jason is full on grinning now, and Yuzu would do almost anything to keep him looking like that.

“Yes,” he therefore admits.

“Let’s do it.”

Usually, Jason is at least as polite and probably a lot nicer than Yuzu is, so it’s a surprise to see such a reckless glint in his eyes.

“Put on your jacket,” he instructs, and Yuzu complies, watching Jason do the same. He looks damn good in his black leather jacket, Yuzu should have told him that. Well, no time like the present.

He steps around the table, puts a hand on Jason’s lapel, and leans in closer.

“This looks good on you.”

For a second, Jason’s mouth actually drops open, but he catches himself quickly. A little impish grin slowly reappears on his face, and he asks,

“Good enough to run away with me?”

Yuzu had always thought that ‘his heart jumped in his chest’ was an expression that belonged in kitschy romance novels. If that is true, he is in one right now, and he isn’t complaining.

“Let’s go.”

They’ve barely taken two steps from the table, when Jason stops abruptly and goes,

“Shit.”

Yuzu giggles, until he sees their frowning waitress make her way towards them and realises they almost forgot to pay.

As quickly as he can, he gets a few bills out of his wallet and practically throws them at her.

“Goodbye.”

Without thinking how it might look, he grabs Jason’s hand and drags him the hell out of there.

As soon as they’re on the street corner, they start laughing uncontrollably.

Not even Jason’s “fuck, she is definitely writing about this on Twitter” manages to scare them into submission. Yuzu holds on to Jason first by one shoulder, then both, then lets his head fall forward until his face is half-buried in the leather jacket.

Unfortunately, that’s when the rain starts to pick up again.

Their laughter finally tapers off.

“Come.”

This time it’s Jason who’s pulling him along; towards a late-night corner shop, Yuzu realises. It’s not that late, actually, but there’s not a lot of people out in this weather, and the shop is empty and silent.

Yuzu has to laugh again when, as soon as they’re thorough the door, Jason yells a dramatic “Do you have umbrellas?” at the unimpressed cashier, sounding as if his life might depend on it, and subsequently proceeds to buy a ridiculously large one with a Canadian flag design.

Before Yuzu knows it, they’re out on the street again, and he realises with a sinking feeling that all that’s left is to go home.

He’d had this all planned out: they’re not too far from the beaches, and if all had gone well, they could have taken a nice walk after dinner, and then –

“Want to go for a walk?”

It’s almost as if he’s been reading Yuzu’s mind, but then again Jason asks it so tentatively, the hand not holding the umbrella gesturing down the street in a flurry of nervous movement. His bout of courage that had propelled them forward until now seems to be running out, and Yuzu makes haste to answer before Jason has a chance of taking it back. It’s still raining, but it’s neither windy nor cold, so Yuzu is only too happy to accept.

He nods, maybe a bit too enthusiastically, and leans into Jason’s side, maybe a bit more closely than the huge umbrella really warrants.

Jason certainly isn’t complaining, though.

Yuzu hides a smile and stays exactly where he is.

Silence stretches between them, but it’s much more comfortable than it had been earlier.

As they come closer to the water, a gust of wind hits them. The rain has been steadily letting up, but now they get a misty cloud of tiny drops full in their faces.

Jason grimaces and angles the umbrella forward a bit.

Maybe they should turn back, but it appears neither of them wants to be the one to say it.

A bit further up the boardwalk, a deserted ice cream stand is closing up, and on a whim, Yuzu ducks out from under the umbrella and runs up. Despite the initial “we’re closed”, a winning smile gets him two cones of chocolate – he doesn’t know what Jason usually takes, but you can’t go wrong with chocolate, can you?

“Perfect,” Jason proclaims a second later, even as he struggles to juggle cone and umbrella.

As if on cue, the rain stops.

_Well, if that isn’t a sign._ Yuzu uses up his packet of paper tissues to dry the nearest bench and offers Jason a seat with a grand gesture.

Jason smiles, and ducks his head, and sits to one side, stretching his free arm over the backrest as if in invitation. Yuzu happily takes his place.

As soon as the ice cream’s gone, he leans back, closing his eyes – and jerks back up again with an embarrassing squeak because Jason’s jacket sleeve is still uncomfortably wet. _Urgh_. He has a cold and water-sticky patch on the back of his head now.

Jason laughs, loud and bright for a few seconds, before it morphs into a shy smile. He brings both hands up and starts to fix Yuzu’s hair.

_He’s so close. _

Yuzu can see his beard stubble, and wants to run his hand over it. God, he really is so close, it would take nothing to lean in. Nothing at all, really only –

When Jason makes to draw back again, Yuzu instinctively holds on to both his wrists.

_No. Fucking kiss me already._

He’s a second away from saying it, or maybe leaning forward himself, when Jason murmurs, not looking at him,

“You know, I was afraid this might be some kind of pity thing.”

With no small amount of shock, Yuzu sees how all of this could have played out from the opposite perspective: one person humouring the other, maybe flattered by the attention they’re getting, just wanting to see how far they can go, _playing with them_ – but, no. _No._ He has been plenty clear. How could anybody look at this and think… how could Jason look at this and think… Yuzu sees red.

“You idiot.”

Jason looks up, startled, eyes wide as saucers.

“No really, how could you think that? I asked you on a date, who asks someone on a date out of pity? How could you ever think I would do that, lead you on after what… after what I told you about what happened to me with Javi, I mean, are you actually serious right now? What on – “

“_Yuzu_.”

Oh no, he’s gripping Jason’s wrists much too harshly, and maybe he has been shaking him a bit in his frustration. And also…

“Yuzu, slow down, please?”

Yep, he has apparently been speaking Japanese, because Jason replies in that language, looking as if he desperately wants to understand what Yuzu said, but couldn’t quite follow.

He’s biting his lip, and he looks so nervous, and Yuzu loves him so.

“So sorry,” he whispers.

“No, I’m sorry,” Jason whispers back, “what was it that…?”

“Oh, forget it,” Yuzu murmurs.

He loops his arms around Jason’s neck instead, and kisses him.

Jason goes very still for a second, and then… and then he’s kissing him back.

_Fucking finally._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... any thoughts? :-)


	7. Encore: Coaches' view

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The epilogue, or: Brian finally gets a clue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, that's it. Epilogue from Brian's POV and with that this story comes to a close. It was a lot of fun to write, I hope you had fun reading it :-)

“Where’s Jason?”

Yuzu is looking around agitatedly, and Brian just shrugs.

“I think he’s gone to change already?” Tracy offers with a small smile that makes Brian immediately wonder if he’s missing something here.

Yuzu snatches his blade guards, stumbling forward as he puts them on and starts walking at the same time in his haste.

“Jaaaaason, wait,” they hear, as he’s already half out the door to the corridor. “I made us lunch, you don’t need to go get something.”

Brian’s eyebrows shoot upwards and he stares at Tracy, who doesn’t seem to find this strange at all, and that’s just not –

“He made him lunch? When has Yuzu ever…”

He trails off, because of the idea forming in his head, which seems to only get confirmed by Tracy’s sunny grin.

“No.”

_This is not happening. _

All the Javi-drama over the years, and now this.

“This is not happening,” he repeats, out loud.

“I think it’s a bit too late for your misgivings.” Tracy pats his arm soothingly.

Brian is very much not soothed.

“You knew about this,” he grumbles, accusingly.

“Yes.”

“And did nothing to stop it.”

Tracy shakes his head at him.

“When has anyone ever stopped Yuzu?”

_Well_.

“Fine, but you’re the one dealing with any ensuing drama.”

Annoyingly, Tracy’s still smiling.

“Oh, I think they will be alright.”

Brian huffs and points towards the glass windows to the lounge, through which he has just spotted Jason and Yuzu arguing about something. Jason is gesturing and rolling his eyes, Yuzu is folding his arms and shaking his head.

Despite the sight in front of him, or maybe because of it, he has the strange feeling that Tracy will end up being right about this.

As he watches on, Jason holds up both hands placatingly, and Yuzu suddenly laughs, going in for a two-handed high five.

Brian catches himself smiling way too soppily as he turns away, back to his next group of students.

Yes, yes, they’ll be alright.

_Fin_

In front of the cameras:

And... behind the cameras:


End file.
